Sunday, February 27, 2011

This week, we feast

I like to visit the cows at the zoo. A lot. By “a lot I intend to explain both how much I like doing it and how frequently. As a service to the city, I visit the cows all winter to check on them and make sure they are okay.  Alex helps me because he says it is my destiny. Everyone knows that the zoo-folks milk the cows at 10 am.  It’s a well-known fact.  There is an eraser board sign about it.

We were up north yesterday, visiting the green city market and picking up the porkchops I ordered from city provisions, when I realized how close to ten it was.  Perfect! Let’s go see the cows getting milked.
Imagine my surprise when we roll up at 10:08 am to find Tina and Amarette unhooked from the milking apparatus, and Lyla already back in her stall, chomping away on alfalfa. Are you telling me it takes eight minutes to milk three cows, zookeeper lady? Because I think that is bullshit, pun very intended.
I was upset, but Amarette got real sassy with the Lady Keeper (she’s on edge because of baby Ginger—Amarette, not the Lady Keeper (poor parenthesis placement)) and that made me feel better.

So we continued on our way, off to hit two more grocery stores to finish getting groceries and prepping for Day 1 of my Master Plan. Oh, what’s that? I forgot to tell you how I made a detailed meal itinerary for this week and I’m calling it the Master Plan (sub titled, “This week, we feast”)?  Well I did. And it is awesome. I will be updating about its progress all week, so feel free to get really pumped about it.
I was going to up my crazy by becoming an extreme couponer. But I can’t coupon. It’s just not for me. I did look into it this week after watching “Extreme Couponing” with Alex because he “needed a break” from the housewives. It turns out that couponing is not for the sort of people who are very picky about their brands and go to four different grocery stores, farmers’ markets, and delis to get fresh local produce and proteins.
Couponing was out, so extreme planning was in. In defense of my crazy, I had kind of a weird week. To put it in perspective: I considered drinking my emergency Oberon—the last of its kind until the end of March.  

...None of this is making me sound any less crazy.


  1. Perhaps not less crazy, but certainly well fed.

  2. I hardly ever see a coupon for food that I want to eat; usually the coupons are "pushing" bad for me/taste bad stuff.

    If that is crazy then I am, too. But what I think is really crazy is that total strangers will tell me that the contents of my cart looks very healthy...but I can peek into their carts and see that they haven't selected anything similar. In fact, they are handing over a fistful of coupons for boxed mac and "cheese" and Pringles.

  3. Wow. I consider it an accomplishment if I plan for the next day's lunch. Forget about dinner six days ahead. I look forward to reading about some of this food.

  4. I forgot to say that I loved the cow pix. Next time you go you should wear your Woody Jackson t-shirt. See if Ginger notices. Or Lyla. Or Tina. Or Amarette. Or the Lady Keeper.

  5. Ummmm so basically I loved every single thing about this post. There. I said it.

    Let's visit the cows together sometime!